And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
