i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
