I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
