He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
