New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
ugly people sure do ruin things
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
