i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
