I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
