sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
