Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
