i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
