My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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