She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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