Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
