Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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