Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
