my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize