Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
