i would punch a child for taco bell
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The uberlube is also flammable
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
