he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
