i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
