I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
