Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
