discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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