What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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