I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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