OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
