waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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