we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm at about main and main street
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
