Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
