I'm so fucking centered right now
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
