So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
We are all done wearing pants today
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
