Whoa Z and x make the same sound
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Randomize
