He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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