She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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