You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
