Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
