Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
