Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
