You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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