I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
