i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Randomize
