i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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