please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
