I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
