So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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