How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize