Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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