I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
