I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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