Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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